something about

his character that's so irreplaceable.

i flipped through one of ben's FB picture albums today. it was pretty simple; he was riding a bike through some "erwin park" with shelly, but it was like i could see him there in person and feel his character right through the picture. idk what it is...

feels kind of like he could find something fun in anything. even the simple stuff. i really don't think anybody else has that kind of quality around here. everybody else needs tech or money being spent to have fun, and that's including the feeling you get when you've spent money.... you HAVE to have fun; otherwise "it wasn't worth it."

i think it helps him that he grew up poor and suddenly found a way to live with a lot of money, which is seen in his general dislike for xbox after a while, and his gradual drift back to basic stuff. for a while, he downloaded so many demos on xbox that he filled up 20gigs worth of hard drive almost instantly, but then the trend faded. i'm definitely jealous of that; to be happy around anything, even when times suck/are boring/don't have much around.

all he needed was a car. that's it. the ability to change places and he was set. that didn't bring anything for me, i still don't abuse it like i should.

don't know if i'll ever be that easily satisfied. can't really see it happening, especially since i hate most things in this world and get pissed off really easily at the little stuff, no matter how marginally imperfect.